we lie awake with brains in overdrive. these odds and ends. tossing and turning lights no clearer path for us. nervous. i am too. emotional suicide, it's suicide. sailing into view our eyes are open wide. we arm ourselves with rags and turpentine. on needles and pins. painted in corners leaves no quick escape for us. pensive. i am too. emotional suicide, it's suicide. bailing into blue skies that are open wide. waiting. poised standing on the ledge just to see who'll jump off first. so much time wanting. so much time waiting for this thing to go somewhere